Talk Done. Still no time.......

Well, I finally got my talk out of the way this sunday. It went ok I guess. Everyone said I did a good job. They always say that.

I was thankful some friends came down to hear it. i always appreciate the extra support. Even if four of the bald heads sat in the slam front row. :) Yes, that's you Winn family :)

Few extras I didn't expect to see came too. That was nice. Out of everything I heard, the thing that went to my soul the most was a Sister in my bookstudy told me how much my talked helped her because she has the tendency to be indecisive. And she named off the three points that i talked about and how she was going to apply them. Out of everything, that made me feel the best. I've always felt a talk is trash if no one learns anything from it, even if it is the most entertaining in the world. If one person leaves with something that helped them, then I feel I accomplished my goal. So I'm happy.

However, I fooled myself. I thought "If I just get this talk out of the way, I can get some TIME. I can get back to LIFE." Nope. This same week, I have a 20 minute service meeting part. Next week is the CO's visit, so I have meetings Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. The one on Friday is going to piss me off, because I know some people are going to complain about nonsense so they can get coddled and make everyone painfully sit through it until 8 or 9 at night.

The next week, I have a #1 talk. Week after that, another service meeting part. Week after that, HBR. It doesn't end. I have to draw the line somewhere. I don't even get 8 hours sleep at night. Much less make my pioneering time. I'm going to have to come off the list. I cannot keep this up. The service I do get, is like "Service so I can get my time service". My joy is GONE. It's become a burden, not a joy. It's not supposed to be this way. It used to be so fun. Now it's a chore, something I have to schedule in.

I sat down last night and wrote all the things I have to take care off on a weekly basis. Guess how much free time I have? Around 6 hours or so a week. That doesn't take into account less important things, like EATING, grocery shopping, SHOWERING, or using the bathroom. Of course, I didn't account for the fact I only get 6 hours of sleep a night.

Then I get to sleep in at Cliff's (Thanks Cliff) Monday, and the BRATwurst who's there is insistent on getting up, making NOISE so no one else can sleep at 9am. So nope, no sleep. I have to take a vacation. Get away, BY MYSELF. A good solid week. No one to worry about, no one to coddle, no phone calls at 7am seeing if I want to 'make a long day in service', or at 10pm at night wondering how a job is going AT WORK. I've got to GET OUT.

So this 20 minute part tonight? It will suck. Anyone want to say anything about it? Well, then don't give them to me anymore. Yep, it's a bad attitude. But I had half a mind to call my PO and tell him to get someone else to do it because I got in at 8:30pm and hadn't looked at the part yet. I'm so SICK OF THIS. Sick of work, sick of having NO TIME WHATSOEVER.

So what will give?